Lent is a funny time in this world of convenient consumption. The idea of “giving something up” seems forced, contrived. It must be a little insulting or arrogant to give up things like sweets, fast food, meat, or Facebook, when many people in the world don’t have any of those things. Wow--what a great model of following Christ! That girl quit eating candy, during Easter season, no less! She’s going to miss out on all those Cadbury Eggs! The idea of sacrificing something so superficial is a little silly. I say this, and I doubt I’ll be able to abstain from those delicious, creme-filled, chocolate delicacies.
In college, Lent was a punch-line. Most of my college pals were Catholics, ranging from moderately devout to non-practicing rebels. We thought Lent was hilarious; we milked almost 40 days of jokes out of it. Our favorite things to “give up” were: being nice, being sober, vegetables, and cheap beer. Once, we our answering machine message said, “We gave up the answering phone for Lent; call us back after Easter.” Now, if you think a dorm full of 20 year-old girls are going to give up their phone, you’re crazy!
So, twenty years later, I prepare for Lent again and this time, I consider it seriously (well, mostly seriously). It still seems contrived to pick some luxury to deny myself for 40 days, or to take on a prayer practice or volunteer project, something I should do anyway. I will probably fall “off the wagon” after a couple of weeks; then I’ll try again. I think that’s the point--the practice, the mindfulness of it, even if it doesn’t matter to anyone else but me.
It is a little silly to think there is anything I can do to prepare for the awesome and amazing gift of grace in the love of Christ. It is ridiculous to think that my small sacrifice can mirror in any way the supreme sacrifice of God’s love for us. But, still, we practice Lent. We meditate, we pray, we sacrifice in our own small way. The liturgy is practice at living in Christ. I can feel pretty connected and spiritual on a Sunday morning when all is right with the world. I can “get it” on a Tuesday evening when the kids are in bed, the house is quiet and I have the Book of Common Prayer. I can contemplate sacrifice and service through the minor discomfort of fasting, or through the gift of my time in volunteering. That how I practice for when times get tough.
Because, let’s be honest, when the shit hits the fan in life, praying and trusting in Jesus is not my first reaction. I get angry, anxious, obsessed, worried, and quite beside myself. I lose sight of the big picture and start spinning in circles. The last time that I lost my emotional balance, prayer brought me back to center. Saying compline every night, whether I felt it or not, gave me some peace. Reading C.S. Lewis or Madeleine L’Engle gave me some perspective. And praying through the weirdness and nervousness gave me space to take a deep breath. Rather than flying off the handle, I could slow down, see the situation for what it was and find gratitude instead of demands. I could trust instead of try to control. If I hadn’t prayed when times were easy, I could have never done it when times were tough. There’s an expression, “You play like you practice.” Maybe it could be, “You pray like you practice.” Lent is time for practice. When you’re sitting in the snowbank calling for your friend, Jesus, it helps that you just talked to him the other day.
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