The Story of Ben (to be continued)

This is the story of a special, average, every-day horse.  The kind of horse who was carefully bred, raised, trained, shown and loved by a family.  The kind of horse who was never a Horse of the Year, a regional champion, a Grand Prix contestant.  The kind of horse who served his owners dutifully and cheerfully every day of his life.  The kind of horse who made his owner smile whenever she thought of him.  The kind of horse that we all know, who live with us every day.  The kind of horse who is not special to everyone, but extremely special to someone.  His name is B.W. Bendigo, or Ben to those who love him.

If a rider is lucky, one or two horses truly become her partner.  Ben was one of mine.  I was 14 when he was born and 17 when I started him under saddle.  I had started a couple of other horses by this time, but he was truly MY project.  For the first 3 years of his riding life, I was the only person on his back.  

Horsemen talk about a thing called “feel”.  Feel is difficult to define, but the best definition is the connection between horse and rider.  It can be physical connection, between the seat, legs and reins.  But, sometimes one can have a “feel of” a horse without even touching him.  Feel is the way a rider and horse work together.  One cannot achieve harmony, or even communicate without a nice, soft feel.  Feel is not taught, but learned; it grows organically out of time, patience and attention to each other.  Ben was the first horse I trained thoughtfully and got a true “feel of” the horse, and I was the first rider he “got the feel of”.  For better or worse, Ben and I created each other’s feel.

Things weren’t always rosy and lovely between us, of course.  Ben was a Polish Arabian and, true to his breeding, tended to be “hot”.  A “hot” horse is full of energy, light in the bridle, light to the leg and quick to react to stimuli.  To this day, that is the type of horse I love the most--because of Ben.  But, hot horses are not always easy.  One day, a judge spoke to me after a class.  He said, “I wish your horse would quit bucking in the canter departs, because he’s a nice mover and I’d like to place him.”  I said, “I wish he’d quit bucking, too, sir!”  A few years later, I decided to train Ben in dressage.  I was eager and intense and Ben wasn’t exactly convinced that this new sport was for him.  After a frustrating ride, my trainer asked me, “Does he ever run away with you?”  I answered (honestly), “No, he always stops when he runs.”

As my ambition grew, I had to leave Ben behind on my family’s farm in Ohio.  I took a position as a working student, pursuing my dream of becoming a dressage trainer.  The lessons I learned on Ben’s back served me well.  Once, a trainer was critiquing my riding (and he was NOT going easy on me); the only compliment he could say was, “I have never seen you lose your temper and take it out on a horse.”  I said, “I’ve had some horses that would have taken me out if I’d lost my temper on them.”  Thanks to Ben I learned patience, or at least forbearance.

By the time Ben was 13, I felt it was time to let him go.  This wasn't an easy decision, but I believe it was the right thing. I have always believed that if a person has a well-bred horse with a good temperament and trains that horse with patience and consistency to be a willing partner to the rider, then that horse will have a happy life.  People will want that horse and will want to take care of him.  I wanted other people to benefit from Ben's gifts, as I have benefited from the training of my other horses.  I felt it was time to pass him along.

So,I sold him to a nice family and helped two girls learn to ride him.  He had matured by then and was a really pleasant, sensitive riding horse.  It seemed like a lovely home.  After a few years, the family let me know they’d found a home for Ben, unless I wanted him back.  The home sounded nice to both of us, with other kids around to pay him attention and a place where he could be lightly used for the rest of his life. 

Since then, something went terribly wrong.  On Tuesday, April 9, twenty-three horses were removed from a farm because of severe neglect.  Five were found dead in the stalls.  Conditions were horrific.  I have been told there was no food on the property and no water in the stalls.  One of those horses rescued was Ben, MY horse.  They found him dehydrated, starved within inches of his life, his halter leaving grooves in his face, covered in tar-like feces and standing in filth.  And he was one of the lucky ones who made it out alive.

He is now in the hands of a rescue organization, Pawz and Clawz, who are caring for all the horses in the best way possible.  He is building back his strength, with lots of love and attention from eager volunteers.  I hope that I can adopt him when all of this is over and take him back home to where he was born.  He can live out his days in 20 acres of pasture with his old friends.  My family bred him, I picked him out as mine, I trained him, I showed him, I sold him to nice family who thought they found him a good home in retirement. I want him back. I want a Disney movie ending for all of this suffering.

So, what is the moral of this story?  I have NO idea.  Something went terribly wrong at that farm and the people could no longer take care of the horses.  How does this happen?  We can say someone should have turned them in sooner, we can say they should have turned over their horses, we can certainly say I should have never allowed my horse to end up there.  All of those statements are true, but I'm not sure that any of them help.  With a situation so gruesome, I can’t waste time with what should have been.  We can only move forward.  I think the only message from this is that terrible things happen in this world for inexplicable reasons.  But, here’s the beauty of it.

When terrible things happen, people come out of the woodwork to help.  In a matter of hours, the Animal Control officer organized groups of people to feed and transport the horses to a new home.  Horse lovers from across the area came together to clean stalls, groom, donate their time and money to keep 23 severely starved horses alive.  Vets and farriers donated their time and resources.  Clawz and Pawz phones are ringing off the hook with people wanting to help.  My horse is still alive because of all of these people.  Thank you for saving my Ben.  He isn't famous or very special to very many of people, but he is everything special to me.

Information on the rescue can be found at http://clawzandpawz.info/